Love or Chemistry - Key To A Successful Relationship

A Long-Lasting Relationship

Hey there, welcome back! Today's blog topic is relationships. I often find myself pondering about what makes people confident about their relationships. Whether it's a long-lasting one or the right one to step into. I've seen friends excited about a potential partner, only to later find out they've broken up. So, what went wrong? Are there fundamental aspects we overlook when making these decisions? In today's blog, based on my experiences and observations, I'd like to share my thoughts. Remember, these are based on my experiences, and yours might be different. Feel free to share your thoughts with me. 😊

What Is The Definition Of Love?

Let's start by revisiting some definitions of love: kindness, compassion, and understanding, right? When applying these to romantic relationships, there's more to consider. Having these qualities in a partner might seem like strong enough reasons to commit to a relationship, but are these really the right reasons, drivers that we should be basing our decison on? 💭

Difference Between Chemistry and Love

When you meet a cute guy or girl, share good times, and discover common interests, things quickly progress on to the next step. We start seeing them more often and soon comes a time where either one of you or both start to question where is this heading to? 

However, our decision to get into a committed relationship often revolves around how the other person treats us, what they do for us, and how compatible we are. But we forget to ask ourselves, "How much do we care for them? What are we willing to do for them? Are we prepared mentally, emotionally, and physically?" More often than not, our decision is based on how the other person makes us feel. But do we really know what they need from us, and are we ready to fulfill that? Are we truly ready? 🤔

Chemistry and love are distinct. You can have chemistry with many people, but compatibility is what lasts. Love takes time. If you fall in love quickly, you might also fall out of it quickly if the reasons for getting into the relationship weren't right from the start. ❤️

When A Relationship Start To Feel Like A Chore

Do you understand each other's love language? If you often find yourself questioning how to make the relationship work, it might be a sign of trouble. If discussing issues feels like a chore, there might not be love anymore in there. True desire to want each other, and to have a future together is fundamental. Without it, problems persist. Lack of open communication, reluctance to talk, and not being on the same page about growing together lead to major disconnects. 😕

The Cycle Of Avoidance and Acceptance

Many of us are able to sense when something isn't quite right and secretly wonder if are with the right person. However, instead of facing this reality, we prolong relationships for years. Sometimes I wonder, is it the fear of being alone? The fear of wasted time? Or the worry about others' opinions? 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♂️. We probably are fearful of confronting ourselves with the fact that all this time we were wrong about our choice and the fantasy world that we had created will come crashing down. 

The Solution For Better Outcomes

Number 1 in my list is know yourself better. What is it that you want out of this relationship, how do you want to grow and if this relationship will give you that space to grow, what are your values and beliefs when it comes to relationships. Take out some me-time for yourself to be transparent to yourself. Cut off from the clutter and noise of social media, TV, magazines, blogs so that you can find the "true you". Let not be your decision be the result of the influence by the world around you. Let the decision be yours and solely yours. 

Number 2 is the understanding the managing relationships is hard. It will not be a bed of roses. People will change as they grow old, they will change as they become more comfortable in a relatioship, they will change as their personal beliefs, motivations might change. The question here is that are you willing to accept and manage the relationship as  both of you or either goes through the different phases of life or will this natural change break your relationship. 

Number 3 is Communication. Communicate openly, don't keep issues bottled up and the day you finally decide to speak it might have reached to a point that you might not be able to keep the relationship together. Communication is not about speaking only, it is about responding too. It is not just speaking, and responding but also acting upon it to show that you two care about each other. 

Number 4 be honest to yourself first. If things are not working out, don't linger on. Accept the fact that both of you tried your best, may be it is time to move on. 

To conclude, I think love is meant to help both partners grow and not just benefit one of them. Know what is really driving you to take the decision to get into a committed relationship. 

I am eager to hear your stories. Feel free to comment and share this article to whoever who you think might benefit. 

Love and Blessings, 

Mama HealthNut